The Coffee-Maker

This morning, Lexi popped her head into the bathroom, as I was getting ready. Her eyes were still half closed and it was about half an hour before she normally gets up.

“Hey Honey, can you do me a favor? Can you turn on the coffee-maker for me?” I asked her.

“I did already. And now, I am going back to bed.”

My four year old daughter had gotten up for the sole purpose of making me coffee.
The mother – daughter bond has just reached a whole new level.

Mother's Day

Mother’s day this year was the best I have experienced. Both my kids are in preschool so they both made me wonderful gifts in their class. Mateo made me a laminated set of his handprints with a poem about how fast he’s growing up and a picture of him. It was so sweet. I wanted to cry. Lexi made me a bird house, painted every color pastel she could find. She wants to hang it in the yard and we will but there isn’t a bird small enough to get into it.
Then, there’s Ruben. The father of my children.

He got me Rock Band for our Wii. I had been wanting it for months. Let me tell you that I can get lost in Wii games for hours already but Rock Band… with that game, I could lose a few weeks. I opened it up and before I noticed, I had done, “just one more song” for 4 ½ hours. Woopsies! I got the kids rocking with me, singing on the microphone and banging on the drums. It takes me back to the days of being in a garage band and for those fleeting hours that I am rocking out, I forget that I work in accounting and am a mom and wife. For that time, I have my cotton candy pink hair back, I’ve got my led zeppelin shirt on, with my dad’s slacks and suspenders and my red doc martins.

For Mother’s Day, my husband reminded me that I can still be the fun chick I was BEFORE I was a mom. And that’s a pretty awesome gift.

Mateo's 3rd Birthday

Little Mister turned 3 this past weekend and the aching in my heart was unbearable. Its always easier to take Lexi's birthdays because she's not the baby. Mateo on the on the other hand...well, breaks my heart with each milestone because there is no one after him. He's the last child I will have!!!

He woke up and demanded that we sing to him over and over again. And, in the car, driving to Half Moon Bay, he repeatedly used the excuse, "But its my birthday..." every time he wanted what his sister had. This gets old really fast.

He rocked his birthday in his very own composition of clothing (not an outfit!) and was the boss for the day.

Beyond the Super Hero action figures galore, there has been a lot of growing up this little guy has done recently.

Mateo has been potty trained. Which I hear is a big deal for boys before age 3. It was kind of a big deal in our house... I mean, there was a lot of begging and pleading...but he now is happy to be fully using the potty. He also is being bumped up to the next class in preschool a few months early. Turns out, he's pretty smart and would benefit from the bigger kid curriculm. Yea! He also figured out how to ride his bike on slopes which is something Lexi still doesn't have figured out.

All in all, he's growing up. Whether I like it or not.

Little Man

Mateo's third birthday is tomorrow. I will post pictures of his birthday after the party. We're driving up to Half Moon Bay and I am praying that the kids won't kill each other in the back seat of the car during the three hour drive.


It was about this time, three years ago today, that I was bawling in my hospital bed, whole body convulsing uncontrollably, tossing my cookies in a tub. I made my father so uncomfortable that he left, unable to listen...or smell... not really sure which.

The doctor had promised that labor would only take about 6 hours since this was the second time inducing. Of course, that was at 10 am, which was a full 10 hours before. So much for that!

Even at this hour, we were holding out hope for a 05/01 birthday since it would have the same digits as Lexi (10/05) and Ruben and I share the same digits (01/27 and 10/27). When 11:45 rolled around and I still had not dilated past a 2, Ruben said he would settle for Cinco de Mayo.

Hell if I was going to hold this baby in for another 4 days! Sheesh!



I got an epidural around 10 pm, only 6 hours past when everyone thought I would have a baby in my arms. The anesthesiologist told me it would be a short one, because, surely, it could not be much longer. Still, shaking, I fell asleep for a couple short hours around 1 am.

It was around 4 am that the pain came searing back through my body and with screams of pain, I not only told my mother and husband that I was going to die and that my husband was going to die, but when the doctor walked in, I screamed to the room that WE WERE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!!!!!
As, my doctor called in the anesthesiologist, I continued my screaming, crying tirade. I was trying to push a freight train out of a hole I was certain was never intended to become grand central station.

It was about 5:30 am when the nurse announced to the room that I was still only dilated to a 2. And, it was only 20 minutes later that I was screaming about the burning hard pressure of a skull trying to push its way out of my body. Just like that, the nurses were begging me to breathe, I had dilated to a ten and the baby had crowned. I needed to hold him in until the doctor came back to catch the baby. At 6:02 am, Mateo was born. And, our world has not been the same since.

Easter is Near

My kids have been begging me for quite some time now for the "Reaster Bunny" to come to our house and poop eggs full of candy and temporary tattoos all over our lawn. Can I just say, them being more aware of the holidays is one of my least favorite parts of them being in school? Now how and I going to smoothly sneak out and buy the Easter accessories we need? Exactly. I am not. Just like my daughter was hyper aware of Santa shopping to the point that I felt like a criminal the way I snuck around to get gifts.



Anyway...


Today, our downtown association hosted an Easter Egg hunt and pictures with the Easter bunny today, so, of course, at the opportunity to give the kids (and myself) some peace, we went.



For the first time ever, Mateo was the good sport and Lexi was not.





Mateo sat on the Easter Bunny's lap.





Lexi would not.




Mateo got an egg.


Lexi would not even try....


So, here is the best I could do with what I was working with.


On the upside, Lexi totally had the stomach flu this morning but at the thought of getting to see that good ol' Reaster Bunny, she seems to be all better. These fictional icons sure do work wonders.

The Difference Between Moms and Dads

Yesterday was a teacher work day for my kids’ preschool and so I stayed home with them. I booked all their needed doctor and dentist appointments for the morning and then many more activities. We did all the appointments by 10 and then had breakfast, met up with a friend, and headed to the zoo. By noon, we were at Walmart, and then off to the grocery store. I ran the kids around until they were starving and hungry. I brought them home, fed them lunch, and put them down for naps. While they slept, I did 3 loads of laundry, cleaned the kitchen, and put away all of our purchases. I even managed to get in a little lunch for myself.
I was completely wiped out by the time Ruben got home but he immediately laid down for a nap. A new challenge arose: keeping the kids entertained quietly so daddy could sleep.

When he woke up the kids were so excited to tell him all about their day and the zoo. “Mmhhmm… that’s nice” he would say as he paid attention to anything else.

While I was making dinner, Mateo ran to Ruben and said, “Look Daddy! Look! I’ve got monies!!”
“Good job Mateo…” Ruben trailed off. It was clearly his turn to watch the kids but he was doing everything but that.


“Mateo, can I see your monies?” I asked from the kitchen.
“Yea! Mommy, look!”

Inside a little box he had the ENTIRE contents of Ruben’s wallet. Money, credit cards, Mexican pesos…EVERYTHING.

“Oh, Wow! Mateo! This is great! Can I have your money and cards so I can give them back to the right person?” I asked.

“Sure, sure…its Daddy’s” Mateo said, handing over his prize.

“I thought it might be – I’ll make sure he gets what he needs” I said with a wink and a thought of a swift kick in the butt.

So, I am wondering how long it will take Ruben to put the two together and how far he’s going to get today on an empty wallet because I am not giving those things back to him until he figures it out! Maybe then he will pay attention.

Oh who am I kidding?!? That’s the difference between Moms and Dads!

Potty Training is Really a Poopy Job!

Never did I think my world would be so consumed with the thoughts and worries of someone else’s bodily functions as I am, and yet here I am, writing about it and how my son’s diaper days NEED to be over!

With Lexi it was easy. One day we decided it was time to potty train her and the next day she was in panties and doing great. The girl has had maybe 3 accidents ever.

Mateo on the other hand, is the king of control. This toilet training thing has become a battle of the wills in my house. I ask him to go potty he says no. I offer him a treat, he negotiates for a Halloween basket worth of candy and then changes his mind to up the ante and then he holds more power. The more I offer, the more power he gets but just when I am about to throw my hands in the air and give up, he goes.

We are two weeks into the process of training and Mateo is having one accident almost every day and I am finding myself so frustrated and so bothered by it that I can’t concentrate anywhere. I call his school to check in and hear how many times he’s tried, succeeded, missed…I wait and watch as he withholds bowel movements for days like it’s the most important thing. I am pretty sure the next time he goes number two on his Spiderman potty I will be as shocked and thrilled as if Ed McMahon came to my door with an oversized check.

Truth be told, we only decided to train him to save money. It had nothing to do with freeing the landfills of one less child’s disposable diapers filled with excrements or advancing him to the next level of independence. It was all about the $120 we spend a month on him that we could be saving for something more important like, I don’t know, our mortgage?

So now, I am wondering how long is this process supposed to take? What are the secrets to being successful? How do I get the kid to hold it from 8:30pm to 6:00am? Am I going to lose my mind before this whole thing is over, and how does one accident result in so much dirty clothing?!? Do you know how many socks the kid goes through? I had no idea socks would need changed!

Happy Birthday Conlan!

Welcome to the Family Conlan James! As I mentioned in a post a bit ago, my sister gave birth last Monday and we all waited on pins and needles to find out what she was going to have. Baby Boy Conlan James came into the world weighing 6lbs, 7oz. He was 18 ½ inches long and ABSOLUTELY PERFECT! My sister had been very set on having a girl so, I have visions of lots of dresses and hair clips in this poor boy’s future. I have even been told that as his gender was announced, my mother caught on camera a sheer look of disappointment on Jesseca’s face. I’d love to see that one.

To be honest, I think now that she has him home and named and set up in his handsome little bassinet, she couldn’t be happier that he is a he. Because, when you are working on 3 hours of sleep a night, two children under two during the day, and all the fun that comes with nursing, well, learning the tricks of the trade with a new gender is just one more thing that does not need to go into the works.

I remember flipping out about having a boy after having a girl! That was not a cool game to play. Its no big deal now but when you throw hormones out of whack, put your body through the most excruciating workout its ever experienced and then take away all sleep there after, its not nice to throw new plumbing into the game. It was a miracle I never got peed on. I am still not sure how that happened.

An even bigger miracle is that Lexi did not KILL Mateo in his first week of life. She really wanted to, I know. She would slip back and forth between cuddling him and trying to smash his skull in with her sippy cup. It’s an amazing thing, that soft head that babies are born with. Its like nature knew that older siblings would not be receptive to this new adventure called baby brother.


I hope that Jess and Denver experience better luck with Haiden and Conlan than I did with my two little ragamuffins. Congrats, you guys!

My Heart Hurts

My children are away. They are staying with Grandparents until the Aerosmith concert has passed and all is safe and right with this world again. But, in the mean time, I am missing them like a bag lady misses her cart! The world is not right and I should shout it from the roof tops until SOMEONE RETURNS MY CART, I mean children!

It is absolutely amazing how the two creatures on this earth who could make me writhe in misery the most are the two that I find heaven in watching sleep. How can they huddle with their butts up in the air and their arms and legs tucked underneath? How is it that they manage to tweak their necks that far over and still sleep like all is perfect and peaceful? I pull their covers over their goose-bumped bodies and watch them with their simple dreamy smiles and I KNOW this heaven.

Of course, its then that they wake up and start screaming. Lexi does more of whiney nasally thing and Mateo screams like someone just chopped off a very useful body part, but its screaming all the same. That is when I hug them both close, as though they need soothing and silly me! Who was I kidding? These children want nothing of the sort! All they want is to kick and arch their backs and SCREAM as though I am some sort of criminal coming to get them. If you ever want to know what this really feels like, go to the nearest sorority house wearing a black mask and threaten to steal underwear from the drawers. Its kind of like that! A lot of screaming and squirming and kicking!

Still, these two that have me apologizing for every meal I make that is not EXACTLY cheddar cheese or cookies, are the people in life I love the very most and when they return, while “Walk This Way” is still ringing in my ears, I will give them each a gigantic sniff, a quick kiss and release them before all hell breaks loose!

Out of the Mouth of Babes

You never know quite what to expect with my father. I swear, you would think I would know him well enough by now but, no...he comes out of no where with a one of these...

The other night, I was at a meeting and Ruben was at a meeting and my parents were watching the kids. Now, I expect for them to wrestle and eat ice cream but I would have never guessed what was I would walk into when I went to pick the kids up. Let me paint you a picture. I open the door to see Lexi sitting in front of the TV with "Pa-pa" watching commercials eating raisins, no big deal until she opens her mouth and then...

Out of the mouth of my 2 1/2 year old comes, "Ooohhh! Nice Rack! Pa-pa, you see the nice rack?" My daughter might be the world's first ever toddler sexist pig. Thank you very much! That's about as acceptable as it was when she started telling everyone, "kiss my ass" about six months ago.

Can you believe these things come out of such a sweet looking little girl?












Nope, me either...

She will win Wolfgang Puck's Heart

My daughter is a complete nutcase!

I guess all two and a half year olds are but I just can do nothing but sit back and laugh at this girl some nights.

She has developed a taste for unique foods like feta cheese and spinach; she prefers these things to ice cream. What the heck is wrong with this girl?

The night before last, I heard her walking through the house and then some whining in her room but ignored her because, quite frankly, I was tired and she didn’t have her face thisclose to my face so, I didn’t think she needed me but, when I got up, I discovered that this little goober had gone to the kitchen opened the fridge that she swears she cannot open and gotten Mediterranean olives, taken them back to her room and had been sitting there in the dark eating them like a closet foodie! She must’ve whined when she knocked them over because when I walked into her room that morning I just saw olives and pits splattered all across the floor and the happy (stinky-breathed) little girl was sound asleep in her bed with olive skin on her right cheek.

Tell me we are not beginning all sorts of complexes here!

Drum Roll Please...

The word is out! Mateo's God parents will be Elena and Omar Martinez. Ruben has yet to pick the date of the baptism but it will be somewhere near Mateo's first birthday. Let me tell you, picking was not easy. There were many great people to look at but we knew we made the right decision the moment we asked Nena and were met with a response loud and clear, "oh my God! Yes! OHHHHH!!!!!!" I have a ton of confidence in these two and I know they can care for our little guy so well! I know that if anything were to happen to Ruben and I that Omar would teach Mateo everything he needs to know about soccer and all things boy and Elena would teach him everything he needs to know about forming his own opinions, treating girls the way they should and dressing to kill! I have the greatest confidence that these two will give this little guy room to grow but not too much to wander.